How To Deal With An Abusive Marriage Through Psychotherapy?


How To Deal With An Abusive Marriage Through Psychotherapy?

There are many other ways also other than physical violence for marriage to be abusive. Partners may use sexual, psychological, emotional or physical abuse to be in a superior and commanding position to control the other one. Nearly 50% of all women and men in the US experience psychological violence because of an abusive marriage.

11 Top Psychological Abuses of Abusive Marriage: 

Psychological abuse occurs when one partner in abusive marriage tries to control the information available to another partner with the intention to manipulate the partner’s sense of reality. Psychological abuse is the most common development in an abusive marriage. The more in common eleven psychological causes of abusive marriage are:

  1. Humiliation or embarrassment
  2. Hypercriticism
  3. Constant put-downs
  4. Communication refusal
  5. Ignoring
  6. Extramarital affair
  7. Unreasonable jealousy
  8. Extreme moods
  9. Making fun
  10. Less or no affection
  11. Enhanced domination

Top Five Psychological Problems That Often Occur Because Of Abusive Marriage:

Abusive marriage may affect you in many ways disturbing your psychology that changes your behavior at each level;may it be social relationships, family engagements, or working in the office.

  1. You often feel insecure because of continuous putting-down efforts by the spouse. If you doubt your spouse of cheating, you can also hire a private detective.
  2. You experience the effects of depression like low mood, dejection, suicidal thoughts, hopelessness etc.
  3. You feel under the effects of anxiety like nervousness, worry, unease, restlessness, muscle tension, fears for unexpected developments etc.
  4. You feel down because of unrealistic fear or imagined social shame
  5. You feel under the nostalgic effect of Posttraumatic stress

Importance of Psychotherapy to Deal with Abusive Marriage- Ten Benefits:

Therapy is very effective for the couples facing complex relationship issues; however, a Psychotherapist can help you only if he truly understands the problem. Psychotherapy for abusive marriage problems is aimed to rebuild the victim’s confidence and self-esteem. The salient ten benefits of psychotherapy for abusive marriage conditions include:

  1. Recognizing the triggers for the problem
  2. Learning to manage anger
  3. Interpreting behavior of self
  4. Developing the habit to stop blaming
  5. Knowing the personal abilities and recognizing the worth of self
  6. Improved patience to let the disturbing waves go off and react calmly at the right time
  7. Improved confidence for not being dependent
  8. More focused on self-feeling of being stress-free
  9. Incorporating behavior changes to make the responses better balanced
  10. Acceptance of realities

Hit The Root Cause Of Abusive Marriage Through Psychotherapy:

The goal of abusive marriage therapy is to hit the root of maltreatment for a particular behavior. During the sessions, Psychotherapist will help you analyze:

  • Who is an abuser?
  • When and how did it start?
  • Since how long has problem been occurring?
  • Have you shared the problem with anyone?
  • How do you feel in peak tides of abnormal behavior?
  • Have you resisted to the abuser? What was the response?
  • What does precipitate the abuse?
  • What does happen after abusive words or actions?
  • Does the abuser turn physically violent? If so, how many times it happens.

Role of Abusive Marriage Psychotherapist: 

Psychotherapist introduces modern behavior change techniques to the abusive marriage victim. The purpose of abusive marriage psychotherapy is to help the victim recognize unhealthy mindset and behaviors like making excuses for the abuser, apologizing for abuser’s indecent behaviors, keeping the abuse a secret to self etc. Psychotherapist helps the victim to know how his/her behavior has been abusive, damaging and unhealthy. Psychotherapist assigns the role with realistic goals to hit through actions to help the victim move forward with partner or separately.

Types of Psychotherapy to Deal with Abusive Marriage:

  • Individual therapy- One-on-one session in caring, confidential & safe environment to explore victims’ feelings, behaviors, beliefs etc.
  • Group therapy – Allows the personal interaction with participants who share their experiences to help other individuals move forward, cope, grow and come out of depression.
  • Journaling – A writing therapy focused on the writer’s thoughts, experiences & feelings.
  • Cognitive behavioral therapy – A psycho-social intervention aimed to improve psychological health for improving emotional regulation.
  • Somatic therapy – An alternative therapy very effective in treating post-traumatic stress disorders

The couple counseling may be successful only if both the partners are willing to take the responsibility for indecent actions and are ready to change the behavior as suggested by the psychotherapist; however, this type of favorable condition is seen rarely. Better, you approach the Psychotherapist alone and introduce your partner at a later stage.

Concluding Note:

The goal of abusive marriage psychotherapy is to reprocess the so far bitter experience with a hope of changing the way of seeing, facing and managing the developments and also the way of understanding self and loved ones; most of the times, it brings out positive behavior changes. The success mantra is – “Continue walking on eggshells with hope for improved relationships while being honest with Psychotherapist.”

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